


you will be found™ gang

by sadrien



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Angst, Eventual Fluff, F/F, Gay, How Do I Tag, It's More Likely Than You Think™, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Texting, Tree Bros, a group chat fic, angst in a group chat fic?, eventual galaxy girls, eventual tree bros, galaxy girls, group chats, jareds forever alone
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-09 09:49:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11666688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadrien/pseuds/sadrien
Summary: TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: wow fuck yuo evEvan Hansen: no thank u that isn't your jobTheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: ur right it's the murphy's jobTheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: but which oen ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)Evan Hansen: jARED N O





	you will be found™ gang

**Author's Note:**

> hi yes!!! this is my first DEH fic even tho its not reslly a fic but oh well imma make a real one soon anyways so stay tuned ig??  
> other than that this actually has some sort of plot and im probably gonna update pretty often so ye!!

[ _Sunday; July 30, 2017; 10:49 P.M._ ]

[ _hoey murphy added_ _conartist, TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman, Alana_ _Beck, and_ _Evan Hansen to the conversation_ ]

hoey murphy: henlo asshats

Alana Beck: Oh! What a lovely surprise, Zoe.

Alana Beck: Although, my curiousity gets the best of me, why the name choice? You are in no way that  
insult.

hoey murphy: oh dwdw its a joke alana haha

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: alana why do you type like my grandma

Alana Beck: Jared, why does your usernsme portray you as an insecure seven year-old?

Alana Beck: Username* excuse my incorrect spelling.

conartist: lol only time i'm gonna speak in this is to roast kleinman

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: wow fuxk you all

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: also connor who tf was talking to u

conartist: its fuckin america bitch freedom of speech  
  
TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: haha it's america time to shoot up tje fucking shoot because i have freedom!!!

Alana Beck: Jared, I am frightened that you have gone too far this time...

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: na murphys gonna be fine his freakass has heard worse

hoey murphy: yeah alan a dont worry jareds righr but xonnors such a fuck up thaf even if he tried to shoot up the school he'd fail lmao

Evan Hansen: that

Evan Hansen: tHat isn't exactly a nice thing to say, zoe

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: wow he's alive

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: and all that it took to _coerce_ him into speaking was insulting his gay ass boyfriend

Evan Hansen: woW big words Jared are you sure you're ready to incorporate those into your five year old vocabulary

conartist: damn

Alana Beck: That is very funny, Evan! Nice roast!

Evan Hansen: um

Evan Hansen: thAnk you ????

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: wow fuck yuo ev

Evan Hansen: no thank u that isn't your job

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: ur right it's the murphy's job

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: but which oen ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Evan Hansen: jARED N O

hoey murphy: sorry evan i'm like super flattered b ut

hoey murphy: i' m jusg not attracted to you

Evan Hansen: nonono it's fine zoe i don't like you like that!!!!

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: yeah zoe dont u know he has the hots for ur bro

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKlainman: he thinks of connor each night

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: and he rubs his nipples and stARTS MOANING WITH DELIGHT

Evan Hansen: jARED

hoey murphy: di d you just make a rhyme out of evan's love life

Evan Hansen: IT' S NOT MY LOVE LIFE

hoey murphy: LMFAO I SHOULD TELL YOU ALL CONNOR RUSHED OUT OF THE ROOM AS SOON AS HE CHEDKED HIS PHONE

hoey murphy: HES LIK SUP R PINK I CANT BREATHE

conartist: FUCK YOU ZOEY I WAS COLD

hoey murphy: cue his horny teenage masturbation rn

conartist: i m not jackinf off fUCK YOU

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: dont worry school shooter evans super gay for u too

Alana Beck: Um... This conversation took a turn in the wrong direction. That's very rude, Jared.

Evan Hansen: ye like super rude

hoey murphy: why does everybody take connor's side i dont get it????

TheInsanelyCoolJaredKleinman: yeah its not lik e hot topic has feelings

conartist: FUCK YOU KLEINMAN WHAT THE HELL DID I EVER DO TO YOU

hoey murphy: shur up connor uou fuckin deserve rhis shit

[ _PM between Evan Hansen and conartist_ ]

Evan Hansen: con are you okay???

conartist: im fuckinf fantastic hansen

conartist: can you not tell by my upbeat demeanor

Evan Hansen: im sorry con

Evan Hansen: nothing jared said is true

conartist: FUCK YOU HANSEN YOURE PROBABLY IN ON THE SICK JOKE

Evan Hansen: connor i care about you why would i set jared up to insult you??

conartist: this is one big fucking prank to piss me off isnt it

conartist: well you know what

conartist: FUCK YOU

Evan Hansen: CONNOR IM NOT TRYING TO MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE CRAP IM SORRY IF IT SEEMS THAT I AM

Evan Hansen: CONNOR

Evan Hansen: CONNOR!!

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON

Evan Hansen: CON!!!!!

conartist: WHAT DO YOU WANT HANSEN

Evan Hansen: if youre not at my house in ten minutes im biking to yours

conartist: i wont answer

Evan Hansen: ill break in the window

conartist: no you wont

conartist: you wouldnt even leave a scratch on my window

Evan Hansen: ..

Evan Hansen: its kind of sad that it's true

conartist: lol

Evan Hansen: so are you cominf or not? we can talk about anything u want

conartist: can u tell me more about trees

Evan Hansen: sure ill ask my mom if yiu can sleep over too

conartist: ok say hey to heidi for me

Evan Hansen: you're gonna be here in 10 minutes

Evan Hansen: and she said yes so bring ur pjs and a toothbrush

conartist: WAIT

conartist: DO YOU HAVE FOOD

Evan Hansen: we'll order a pizza

conartist: ill answer the door

Evan Hansen: ok

Evan Hansen: thank u

conartist: np

conartist: ill be there in 5 

 

 

 


End file.
